Saturday, November 19, 2011

The Story of Jimmy Evans

I was working on my degree in Violence and Trauma at NYU when my guiding professor came to me and suggested I snag an interview with Jimmy Evans. He actually had a letter in his hand from Jimmy at the Winslow Prison asking that someone from the department come and write his life's story. As a notorious serial killer, Jimmy had an impressive kill rate and his own fan club. It was the chance of a lifetime for someone like me who wanted to unlock the key to a serial killer's mind and write a stunning doctorate. It would make my career if I handled it right. They scheduled the appointment for two weeks later, giving me some time to prepare.

First I assembled the facts. Jimmy Evans, now 29, was a Brooklyn native. The signs were there early in his life-abandoned by his father, promiscuous mother with multiple marriages to the wrong man, abusive grandfather, and the mysterious disappearances of neighborhood pets. Finally behind bars, Jimmy had admitted to thirty-two murders of males, usually middle-aged to elderly. Odd, I thought. Serial killers usually go for a younger generation. That just meant I would have more digging to do into his twisted mind to reveal his true motives.

It was a rainy Monday afternoon in October when I entered Winslow Prison outside New Albany with my tape recorder and notebook. It was all I was allowed to bring in. After the body search, they led me to a room where Jimmy sat in his ornage jumpsuit handcuffed to a table. Two prison guards flanked his side. Again I was struck by his youth since the newspaper's picture had made him look much older and sinister. Sitting quietly at the table and smiling like he didn't have an impending date with an electric chair, Jimmy said, "Hi! How you doing? How's the weather out there?" It was hard not to like him.

I made my introduction and took a seat. I turned on my tape recorder and got down to business. "Tell me about Hank Givens, your first victim," was my first question.

"He wasn't my first," Jimmy calmly replied. "That's why I asked you here. To set the record straight." I didn't say another word for the next thirty minutes as Jimmy took me back into his childhood.

No one was more surprised than Jimmy when his Irish soccer coach showed up for the game only a week after his wife's funeral. Cedric Ferguson led the team to victory by shouting, calling the refs names, and picking fights with parents. Cedric was a forty-year-old bully, but he usually got his way. The team always won the city championship, but someone had to be carried off the field on a stretcher.

Jimmy, the eleven-year-old goalie, had always liked Mrs. Ferguson. She made cookies for the team, iced their knees, and cheered them on each season. Her sudden death, a nasty fall in the bathtub and subsequent drowning, had hit Jimmy hard. The coroner had ruled the death an accident, but Jimmy wasn't so sure. He'd always had a feeling about Coach Ferguson. Beneath his professional facade, Jimmy sensed a dark hole of evil. Cedric was a seething volcano on the field, threatening kids and parents alike. Some weaker kids went crying to their mothers and left the team. But not Jimmy. Deep down he felt he and Coach Ferguson were soul mates of the bad sort. That's why Jimmy always kept his cat strangling cord in his pocket. It made him feel like the coach's equal.

After the game, Jimmy watched the coach come over to his mother and strike up a conversation. The words "dinner" and "movie" floated to Jimmy and he felt the darkness growing inside of him. His mother like male attention.

"His wife just died, Jimmy. He's lonely. I'm lonely too. It's been two years now since your father ran out on us. Aren't I entitled to a life? Some fun?" she argued with him in the car on the way home.

"I think he killed his wife," Jimmy stated flatly. "You could be next."

"Don't be silly, Jimmy. It was an accident. I know he's a little rough around the edges, but I'm not going to turn down a free dinner."

But Jimmy wouldn't let it go. When Coach Ferguson arrived at the door later in the evening, Jimmy stopped him. "I think you killed your wife," he stated again. He expected to be punched, but instead, the older man just smiled.

"I can do the same to you, bud, if you don't watch yourself." He thumped a finger on Jimmy's chest and whispered in his Irish accent, "Accidents happen. Who's the adult here? You can't do a thing." Then his mother came to the door and Jimmy stopped talking. On the way out, Coach Ferguson turned and said, "You be good now," and winked.

Jimmy was many thing, but good wasn't one of them. The police never found the killer of Cedric Ferguson. His body, minus his head, was found in the First Street Motel by the maid. His car was parked outside and the parking lot camera showed the coach leaving his car. He checked in but he never checked out. A bloody hammer and saw were found on a homeless man's pile for sale around the corner. He claimed he had just found the set on the sidewalk. Several people at the coffee shop swore that his claims were true. They had walked around the items themselves just lying in a bloody pile on the cement. The DNA matched Cedric's. They also said they saw a boy in a black ball cap walking by with a bowling ball bag.

Dogs traced the scent of blood to the subway station and the E train. Cameras recorded the picture of a boy, his face completely obscured by the cap, sitting quietly on the train with his bowling ball bag between his knees. When he got up, a puddle of blood reamined on the floor. Here the trail ended as the boy disappeared out the doors. No one knew where the head was. Then another call came into the police station.

Sam Henderson, Battery Park city worker, arrived at the Irish Hunger Memorial on North End Avenue to trim the lush grass. As he headed up the path, he came to stones depicting Longford County, Ireland, when he noticed a soccer ball embedded in the grass. Sam was used to finding potato chip bags, condoms, and empty coke cans. He reached down to retrieve the ball for his grandson to play with, but dropped it when he saw what was under it. Looking up at him were the blue Irish eyes of Coach Cedric Ferguson. The ball rolled down the path while Sam dialed 911, barely able to keep his lunch down.

Most of the soccer team turned up for the funeral of Coach Cedric Ferguson. Police interviewed parents and searched the crowd for the ball cap. No one recognized the boy in picture.

"But your mother," I finally interrupted. "She must have known. She would have recognized the cap and the bag. Your father's, right?"

"I buried the cap, jacket, and bag. Even then, I knew how important it was to destroy the evidence. Of course she knew, but she didn't want to believe I was capable of luring the coach to a motel, hammering in his skull, and cutting off his head with my neighbor's saw. We never talked about it."

"Wouldn't you say you were awfully lucky to get away with it?" I insisted.

"I did learn a lot from Coach Ferguson. You might say he was a role model for me in several ways. Shame about my mother later on. Nasty fall in the bathtub. But then, we all have to die of something, don't we?"


Thursday, November 3, 2011

The 20th Anniversary

Dan hadn't spoken a word to Daisy since she had returned from the restroom. She was used to the silent treatment, but for God's sake, this was their 20th anniversary. He had even picked the place, a high-priced restaurant where they piled a little food in the center of the plate and drizzled sauce around it forming a happy face.

And there sat Dan, eyes half closed, staring at his plate and refusing to pick up his fork. What had happened to them, Daisy asked herself, the tears close to the surface. She remembered when they had first met-she the seventeen-year-old shoe clerk and him, the postman who delivered the mail to the store each day. Love at first sight, she thought.

Soon they were an item, unable to keep their hands off each other. They quickly married and settled down to a normal life. Babies came along and the spark began to cool. Romantic getaways and intimate dinners became a thing of the past.

Now, when they spoke, they discussed his high blood pressure and bad back. She struggled with her dying hormones and low thyroid. What had happened to the couple who used to enjoy long conversations over a glass of wine? The kids were grown now, heading off to college. Soon they would be free to do all the things they had dreamed of years ago. But there Dan sat, not even speaking to her.

The waitress suddenly appeared at the table. "How's the food?" she asked. Daisy threw down her fork, fuming. She had had enough.

"How would I know? He won't even touch it!" she spat in anger. "What's your problem, Dan?"

"Sir?" the waitress gently touched the man's arm. Dan fell across the table without a word, dead. Daisy screamed.

The Third Eye

Just now with my third eye I see,

That a crack has formed in the universe.

You frown, become silent, glare in that way you do.

Something I said, something I let slip out loud.

Lock me up in the cosmic jail and throw away the key.

I've violated some agreed upon taboo

And am declared a leper.

You won't speak to me except in terse phrases.

I am punished for my insolence by more insolence.

Then the Red Sea parts and I escape to a happier place.

I am eventually forgiven, but I neve forget.

Baby sitting on the Pavement

The baby sat sucking on her fist.

No fancy tea for her,

No Starbucks favor of the month.

The cookie was torn apart

In minute crumbs for incoming ants.

She sat down on that diapered bottom,

Refusing to budge. Pay attention to me-

She seemed to say. Come down to my level.

Picking at the dirt, she is more real than I.

I just pretend to be a grown-up.

Buddha

Lotus Candle lit

On the tall, smoky altar

God Buddha keeps score.



Friday, October 14, 2011

Blue.


Blue is the color of the glacier ice in New Zealand

Blue is the color-
Of the glacier ice in New Zealand. 
It’s pure water, old rain sealed in coldness
For eons. Slowly melting like the years
Of my life into the icy river below.


Blue is the color-
Of the rolling waves at Bin Tan, Indonesia.
I watch as a lazy black monitor lizard
Floats tail up in the blue water. 
He darts here and there looking for fish or he is
Searching for me. I could be the bait in the blue bathing suit!


Blue is the color-
Of my new Log Cabin quilt made by my 
94 year old grandma. I could make my own,
I learned how from her long ago,
But it wouldn’t be special-a moment between us,
A cord of blue linking us as kin. 
Hope I can sew blue at that age.


Blue is the color-
Of the sapphire bracelet my husband bought me
In Cambodia on a dark blue night. 
“You should wear more jewelry,” he said.
I use to have a blue velvet dress he liked 
That I wore at Christmas. Soft as snow. 
Blue becomes me.


Blue is the color-
The doctor announced and prescribed anti-depressants.
Low thyroid, then no thyroid. Menopause. 
Metabolism B. Fibromyalgia.
It’s hard being blue, so cut me open and let the blue drain from my soul.
Color me orange instead.

Monday, October 10, 2011

Packing

Assignment from poetry workshop: write a scene involving packing.

The Packing

"No warnings, Sam?"
Her red plaid suitcase lay open on the bed. He watched her pack, sitting on the side of the bed. She opened and slammed drawers, tossing her last items in the bag. She was leaving on a week-long business trip to England.



"No warnings, Sam? No grim tidings or is that second sight of yours on the blink? Isn't this the time when you tell me not to get on the plane because you have a bad feeling about it?"



Sam shook his head. "You'd just laugh at me," he said. "I guess my latest predictions haven't panned out."



She laughed, perhaps a little too loud. Sam frowned but said nothing. "Well, you really missed the ball with that stock market tip that came to you in a dream. And what about that million-dollar lottery ticket you promised me?" she asked him.



Sam smiled faintly. "Someday. Send me an email when you get there so I know you're safe."



"Sure." Outside a taxi horn was blaring. She zipped the case shut, and he carried it to the car. They kissed goodbye and he waved as she disappeared around the corner.


Same came in and sat quietly on the couch for awhile. He pictured her standing in the long line at the counter to drop off her bag. Then he saw her pushing her way through the long security line, getting her shoes and coat x-rayed. Finally he imagined her settled in her first class seat with her ear phones plugged in, the dinner menu selected, and the blanket pulled comfortably over her knees.



That's all he could bring himself to think about. As a distraction he turned on the Sunday football game. Then came the announcement at the bottom of the program and Sam sat up stiffly. Flight 792 to England had crashed into the Atlantic Ocean shortly after take off. All four passengers and crew were dead.


Sam took the news calmly. He wasn't one to say I told you so. Instead, he reached into his wallet and pulled out the million-dollar lottery ticket he had purchased last week and laid it on the coffee table next to the million-dollar life insurance policy he had gotten some time ago on his wife. Somewhere a phone was ringing. He took his time answering.

Thursday, October 6, 2011

Dedicated.

This blog, Mother Fiction, is dedicated to my mother's stories and poems. While I loved posting them on my own blog, I feel that they deserve their own space. I hope you agree. 

Please feel free to leave comments as I know she would love feedback and criticism. 

And now...

A Deserted Island
But we are all deserted islands...

If I gave up my busy life
And decided to get away,
I’d retreat to my deserted island
Where’s there’s only sunny days.

I would take with me a Bible
Because they always say
In it are the correct answers
To all life’s Malays.
But how would I feel compassion
For the world’s despair
Sitting on that white sandy beach,
The sun bleaching white my hair?

I could take a photo album
Of my family and friends.
You know, the ones who never call
Or write letters of amends.

But I wouldn’t have to see them
On that endless shore,
Wouldn’t be concerned with emailing
Or texting anymore.
My memories would fade
Like their pictures in the heat.
I would have my new family to think of-
Sea gulls and geckos, and crabs that I meet.

Perhaps I would take a case of wine
And just one crystal glass
To sip under a rock at dusk
When a lazy day is passed.
Or when contemplating life beneath the silver moon
With a bottle cooling placidly in the blue lagoon.
And when I was done  
With those empty soldiers of brew
I could send out messages of hope
To make friendships anew.

But we are all deserted islands
Why take anything on the trip?
We are born alone, we die alone,
All of us touched by death’s grip.
It’s what we do in between
That marks where real life abounds.
Interacting with strangers
Loving those we have found.
You can visit other deserted islands
To touch other self-centered hearts.
Stick your finger in the waters of caring
And watch the ripple grow from your start.